Monday, March 30, 2009

Do your best in all things … BELIEVE YOUR BEST IS ENOUGH.

My second cup of tea has filled me nicely. Breakfast of steamed millet and hard cooked eggs seem to be settling into my system with good effect. I feel nourished. My sewing machine is on the floor, the basket of rope piping I began the other day gets longer. I've found a real set of Sharps for hand-stitching and my mind is stepping through the process of making a padded wall for the back of the vardo. It doesn't look like we are going to be moving from The Kitchenette in less than a week ... our things are still as they have been for months. In fact, just prior to moving things get even more jumbled as we live the between-ness of get to the there, from here.

The cold that caught me last week seems to be wearing through me. The sniffles and drips are minimal, my voice still a half octave lower. In some ways the stuffiness creates temporary relief from the ever-on job of the proboscis with multiple chemical sensitivities. It's at this time when my prayer channels needs to be turned squarely in the tuned in position. Like turning over the keys to the gate, I surrender the job of sniffing to the Invisible Companions and do the best I can. Spontaneous napping happens and multiple re-plays of favorite escape films "A Good Year", "Stardust", "Babette's Feast" "Chocolat", and "Miss Potter" keep me company. I drift in and out of nap-land hear the voices of my film friends.

Pete has been out buying the poplar he'll use to make the bed frame. Through the glass door I watched him haul the two arms filled with wood. He caught the pot of millet steaming on the burner ... I'd hoped he would see ... breakfast was being kept for him. The things we do in a day fill most minutes from dawn to dark. Navigating our way through the choices, being honest and gentle as we discern truth that will be comfortable for us ... it takes a village. We are two old dears with a village of faith we sometimes lose track of. Then, the birds come to eat our millet, the moon lights a dark sky and healing dreams take me to all places and times at night.

I just do my best and that is good enough.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Listen … with your whole body … LISTEN RESPECTFULLY

R . E. S. P. E. C. T.
Sister Aretha is singing to me in The Kitchenette. R.E.S.P.E.C.T. I rock across the floor with her and dance in sock-covered feet glorious rhythm, the music takes me through the morning. My list of things to do gets done, and I have some fun. Pete's getting so close to hanging the two-piece Dutch front door. Adjustments need to be made; hanging a door is tricky. I am so lucky to live with an artist like this man. "Don't worry honey, things are going to be okay. Don't let these little things rattle you." A shim here, a shave there. He's right, I rattle a lot if left to my own devices. So, to get that rattle out I'm here at the keys taking a break from cleaning and clearing the kitchen part of the kitchenette. A nice nibble of 71% dark soy lecithin free chocolate is helping, too. I feel the welling of tears bubble and somehow they find a comfortable exit ... perhaps that is one of the exit strategies writers have always taken. Fingertips press to the shaft of the quill; then to the fountain pen; typewriter key; computer keyboard. R.E.S.P.E.C.T...

The process of moving is like hanging a door; it takes adjusting, a shim here, a shave there. We'll be moving into a smaller than The Kitchenette space and only the things we love and need will live inside VARDOFORTWO. I know those adjustments will be made, in time. Today, I focus on cleaning and clearing so I can move the table I use for sewing and cutting into the room. I clean the kitchen, sort through dishes, pots and my stack of clothes and make room. There's a progressive to this whole art project of vardo making and tiny space living. Taken out of place, or too far in advance, the art is rushed and perhaps like watercolor everything smears or become rattled. Living simply is an art project of an exquisite sort. I get to meet my old genetic memory of life with a clutter and stacker mother ... and decide if this isn't just one more of those adjustments that needs a little shim or shave. It's a journey and we love it.

We have shadow on the sidewalk so that means there's some sunshine out there. A batch of milk paint for the door can be mixed and a first coat applied to the raw oak door. It's part of the do list today, and now that I've done a bit of successful Fingertip Exit Strategy, there's room for a little more on the do list.

Hope your day is a little do, a little exit strategy that suites you and above it all, hope Sister Aretha sings a lot of R.E.S.P.E.C.T. into the day.

Aloha, Mokihana

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Believe in Ke Akua, for this higher power makes all life possible … WE ARE NEVER ALONE



TONIGHT IS THE NEW MOON ... The Hilo Moon Oopps.... I am early by a day or night. Today is only Wednesday and by the calendar New Moon is Thursday (goes to show just how much I need this :::smiling to my own dear self:::) ... well, the ritual is done and it felt WONDERFUL and the dream is loving the attention. xx00xx

"Into the darkness of the night, I am making my dreams coming true ..." This lyric is part of a song I was taught when Pete and I lived in Hilo on Hawaii Island. I had been wishing to sing more and within a few weeks after arriving on Hawaii Island I found (and heard) Oona M giving voice lessons in an office next door. My friend Alice had rented the space adjoining hers to a wonderful musician. Each time I sat to chat with Alice I could hear the different voices accompanying the piano Oona played. The voices were not exquisite, yet there would be one that was. Young and old voices simply sang and without doubt each voice was born of joy. It was fun to hear. My wish to sing and enjoy voice lessons came true in Hilo those five years past. The lyric "Into the darkness of the night ..." refreshes my experience with what it FEELS like to have a dream come true.

The Hilo Moon, the New Moon, is an auspicious and powerful time to give your dreams to the fullness of faith, and the darkness of rich potential. Rainbow Tree created a wonderful cleaning and affirming ritual using the egg. I enjoyed doing this ritual during the first new moon of 2009. I am preparing that Egg Ritual as I write this. There are dreams in the making, and the dream of a new location and a new home in VARDOFORTWO are our grandest dream. Being in sync with the energy and cycles of the natural bodies (earth, moon, planets, air, nature's creatures) means I must attend to what is happening with those natural bodies. The Moon is my particularly powerful Home ... it is to Hina I turn when the busy-ness of navigating in the physical body dis-orients and fragments me. My hard-cooked eggs(there are two) are cooled and ready for eating. My affirming dreams written on my egg shaped paper (cut from a brown paper bag) wait for me to be present. Once I have published this article, I will sit with and enjoy my dream-making egg ritual.

Here is an excerpt from Rainbow Tree's cleansing and clearing ritual for a new moon:

Cleansing your spirit or soul is just as important, even possibly more so than cleaning your home! There are things in your life that have been building up, clutter in the brain so to speak. It may even be affecting you by little illnesses, allergies, loss of sleep, irritability and/or a variety of other ways. You may not even realize that your soul/spirit needs cleansing... but it does!

Link to the entire article here. Thank you, Mahalo Rainbow Tree.
Blessed Hilo Moon Mahalo! Mokihana

Monday, March 23, 2009

Practice patience and endurance … TIMING IS DIVINE

DNA


I've been thinking about just how patient I am, and just what I expect of this life. There's a line in the movie Miss Potter. Beatrix is having a go with her father and mother. She is determined to marry Norman, the publisher of her books, and the man she loves. Mama and Papa will have none of that ... a tradesman! No Potter can marry a tradesman. Beatrix demands to know "Does that mean I cannot be happy?" That's the question I have for my own dear self this morning. The thing is probing before trusting is becoming impractical. It takes so much energy to probe and yet living with Multiple Chemical Sensitivities requires probing ... asking pointed questions or suspecting the worst until proven otherwise. Building the wee home on wheels has been a constant process of probing with few choices easily made, and many choices having to be reversed or begun again. We are close and yet we are not yet finished. I am waiting to hear from the Earth Pigment people about using their Natural Wax over the milk paint on the ceiling. I am losing patience, getting worn from enduring...and I'm fed-up.

The tests are constant. I set myself up to turn life into a test, why do this? I have a NAET vile with my name on it. Written across a tiny piece of masking tape is my name M O K I H A N A. Some people are 'allergic' to their own DNA. I would be one of them. I think I'll pull that vile out and give myself a little energy treatment and practice letting go.

Ever feel you're allergic to your own DNA?

Friday, March 20, 2009

Do your best in all things … BELIEVE YOUR BEST IS ENOUGH.


"Let's paint the stainless ..."
Playing with milk paint colors in the blender
Squash Seed Inspiration ...
no thought to WHETHER it will grow
(That's the squash on the left with a friend from the compost pile on the right.)


We are playing in VARDOFORTWO. The stainless steel walls are pieced and fitted, a fresh coat of milk paint covers the ceiling and I have been playing with colors. "Maybe we could just paint the steel," Pete said. An accident while painting the ceiling opened up one more option. `Aue ... alas, maybe. So I took the idea and played with the funky blue and ceiling color to come up with combination that is more like teal brushed it over two pieces of scrap stainless steel. The pieces are drying inside VARDOFORTWO.

The joy of things popped up quickly ... I nearly missed it as I headed to the sink to wash out the blender and squeeze the sponge brush clean. Fortune of fortune though, I did not miss the joy in the moment. It's that simple and small, in the midst of the struggle like squash seeds buried in compost, the tiny seed head BuRSTS through the dark dirt. That seed has no thought to whether it will grow, it knows. While mixing milk paint and making a color yet to be the seed of HAVING FUN JUST SHOWED UP FOR ME. We were just doing our best and the rest ... happens.

We have an idea planted for where we could milk paint steel...and more shall be revealed.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Engage in good health practices … CARE

We have more than our share of things to do here in the Kitchenette, and inside VARDOFORTWO. Among the things that need to be done are the taxes ... which was not a high priority during the months on the road. So, we've some catching up to be done. If you're reading our posts on VARDO ... you know what Pete's been doing, and then it's my turn to switch on the sewing machine and stitch up some island gypsy style coverings.

The thing that I forget, until my body and my spirit, pull me down to the mat, again ... is I live with MCS and my body gets tired even without lots of the 'honey do list.' CARE for me means I will be praying a lot more in the next few days, asking for the support I need to remain sensible about what I can and can not DO ... and gently remain myself to BE who I am.

Fewer posts may appear here while this project of building our home aims at a target date. I'm paying attention to my adrenal glands who are worn and tired more easily. I wish you a day or night of gentle times. Prayers of support and encouragement are always appreciated :)

A hui hou, Mokihana

Sunday, March 15, 2009

`OLE DAYS START SUNDAY, March 15 and last through Tuesday, 17

We will be back to consider another O`o (life tool) after the three days and nights of the `Ole Moon. If you are a new visitor please go to the side bar here to read about the Hawaiian Moon Calendar. During the `Ole Moon we make no new posts, and use these times of 'weeding' or 'repairing nets' ... as people of the land and seas ... to review the decisions we have made, cleanup what needs cleaning, mend what needs mending.

Aloha and a hui hou (love until we meet here again), Mokihana and Pete

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Question for clarity when making decisions … ASK

"They paved paradise. Put up a parking lot, pink hotel, boutique and a swing'n hot spot."
Thanks, Joni Mitchell

Most Saturday mornings Pete and I listen to the local community radio station from 12 until 2 pm, for a weekly dose of Hawaiian music and the voices of island folks who now call Seattle home. The music is always comforting and usually enlivening. The chatter between the pair of d.j.s entertaining although sometimes I slip too easily into judging their opinions ... Today one of the d.j.s was talking about the Royal Hawaiian Hotel ... that's a photo of the 'Pink Lady' above. Built on the shore of Waikiki Beach on the island of O`ahu, this was the first hotel on the beach and with that legacy, the Royal Hawaiian Hotel has maintained its character and identity as the place to be, and be seen. It will cost you big though, and now it seems, according to the d.j. the Pink Lady needed a $60 million dollar renovation.

Was that a good way to spend $60 million dollars? Pete and I worked in the hotel industry for a couple years when we first got back to the islands in 1995. I trained, Pete fixed. We made wonderful friends with the workers there and still count among them a treasure of aunties we would never have met had we not been part of that Westin Maui experience. Thousands of island men and women are employed in the hotel and hospitality industry. Next to the military, the h & h industry is a top of the bill employer in Hawaii.

Is that a good way to spend $60 million dollars? That's the question. In the world you know today is it necessary to spend money on maintaining a legacy of tourism?

Friday, March 13, 2009

Believe in Ke Akua, for this higher power makes all life possible … WE ARE NEVER ALONE

It was a rough night. The journey forward and the building of our wee home on wheels involves processes that can trigger an over-load in me. Even with all our best intentions and preparations, a upset can happen. I am getting better at living with multiple chemical sensitivities and reactions ... and yet, some times the demand is just more than we (Pete and I alone) can manage. We melted down into the cauldron of surrender and there was Ke Akua and the angels to hold us through the night.

We slept late, and with breakfast I sat to find a gift, a COMMENT and a ANSWER to my question yesterday, "What or where do you go when you are in need?" An anonymous gift giver left me this:

The Hermitage by Rima Staines. This is a place, a hermitage with many rooms filled with comfort, quality, ancient and timeless tales. I have gone to a few of the rooms and feel at home there. Life journeys are extraordinary, and to find Rima Staines' artistry commends the struggle to the cauldron of surrender ... Thank you anonymous gift-giver, thank you.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Know that wisdom is found in many places … SOFTEN THE GROUND OF YOUR BEING


Clipart Credit: www.dryicons.com

Sometimes I just wake up crying. Looking around and looking inside, I'm not sure why except to say "I'm overwhelmed by life on occasion." We have a lot on our plates on some days, and when an exposure from an unexpected or unidentified source shows up ... it gets overwhelming. Sitting on the edge of the futon I just let the sadness well up and out my tear ducts.

Small things can be done and that included the simple ritual of a couple cups of morning tea with rice milk and a warm breakfast of barley bread and eggs.

Then I went looking for new friends and here are a few I found:

HILLARY
First, I went to ThisTinyHouse where Hillary was blogging about new policies for tiny homers. Ah, I felt our journey was not an isolated accident. There are people living this parallel dream.

Hillary has a great sidebar of friends and folks, I visited a couple ...

MICHAEL
Michael loves cob and on his blog today is a beautiful round cook stove built for his diva of a cook sister-in-law. I have trouble with wood smoke for now, and yet Pete has visions of building a bread oven outside. He melted into the photo and wanted this! Wanted to build one.

ALICE
Another of Hillary's friends is Alice. Alice and her family have been wandering the continent since selling their UK home in 2008. Alice writes and loves what they are discovering on their journey.

This quote lays at the bottom of her website: Wandering re-establishes the original harmony which once existed between man and the universe.
~ Anatole France

ALICE in Nova Scotia

And finally, I found a new blogger who loves two of my favorite things: art and tea. Her post for March 10, 2009 includes a picture of 'the winged messenger' ... a totally joyful and supportive image. If you're looking for a bit of the pat on the back and a message that gets to the heart of you ... "You're going to be okay" is just the ticket.

Thank you for the joy of new friends wherever I may find them. MAHALO, MAHALO, I feel it, "I'm going to be okay." I've been to the beach, breathed in deeply and walked with the beach stones under my feet.

What do you do when you're in need?

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Feel the heartbeat of the culture … MAKE TIME FOR LOVE

The kitty and I are in love with sunshine. In spite of the cool temperature outside, the sun is fully present and shadows come to witness the sunshine. Ever notice how you can't see a shadow without light?

Hope you have a bit of both ... light and shadow. Aloha ~

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Keep a keen sense of observation … NOTICE

Our beautiful compost is home for the organic acorn and butternut squash seeds.
There they are in the warm dark dirt, getting a gentle pat as they get cozy and set healthy roots.
Grow strong and sweet, darlin's.
If we need to we will build a cold frame to keep the starts growing waiting for enough sunshine to set them into the garden spots.

Tonight the Mahealani (Full Moon) is in the sign of Virgo. Full Moon is an excellent time for fishing and planting. This morning I planted our first seeds for the new gardens that will grow just outside the VARDOFORTWO over in the foothills of the Olympic Mountains. We've saved the organic squash seeds from the sweet, orange acorn and butternut squash. We noticed which ones were especially tasty and kept those seeds. Pete has been keeping track of the moon phases and timing them with our hitch-up the trailer schedule. He's been paying attention, too.

Life can get very complicated, and yet like our friend and fellow trailer builder Tom Riddle from Toronto reminded me yesterday ... in spite of the complication he feels blessed. If I'm paying attention I notice the blessings. There you go ~ Thanks for that Tom.

Cheers! Mokihana

Monday, March 9, 2009

Believe in Ke Akua, for this higher power makes all life possible … WE ARE NEVER ALONE

On the way into the woods, I stopped to notice these crocus beauties smilin' at us.
Oooolahlah.

Saturday, March 7, 2009

Practice patience and endurance … TIMING IS DIVINE


Almost ten years ago I published a small booklet "Makua O`o ~the art and practice of becoming kupuna (elder)" Using my desk top publisher I assembled a master and took it to the local print shop and made hmmm... maybe fifty copies printed. Out of my own pocket I paid for my time and the expense of printing these little books. At the time I was a freelance writer and community organizer working with groups interested in exploring the link between traditional cultural values and present-day work settings. How would the ideas of consciously developing life skills find its way into the corporate and non-profit worlds? In my bones I knew the nine life skills had unmistakable application. I took my little books into workshops and board rooms, and told my stories. Without apology I wove the stories and listened for directions from the voice within me. In small increments I shared the teachings of Makua O`o with those who were interested. I think it entertained some people, entranced others who were not sure what or how Makua O`o would 'fit' into their lives. As with the kupuna who shared the teachings with me more than ten years ago, few at the time embraced the practice.

Time has passed. And then I received a call. Out of that past life a former co-worker called to ask permission to continue referencing my little book in her work. My old friend and co-worker, now retired as a diabetes health nurse and community educator, introduces herself as Makua O`o as she works in the Island communities restoring stone walls around the hei`au (traditional Hawaiian temples and observatories), cleaning lo`o kalo (taro patches). Through time, the practice has found a place ripe for growing. Timing is divine.

"The makua (adult) comes to the shoreline and looks out to sea watching and waiting for the ship bringing canned salmon, canned tuna and SPAM. The makua o`o comes to the shoreline and looks out to sea, and remembers how to fish."

-from the booklet Makua O`o~the art & practice of becoming kupuna
Copyright, 1999
Yvonne Mokihana Calizar

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Know that wisdom is found in many places … SOFTEN THE GROUND OF YOUR BEING

Language, especially the written form, can be like water. If wisdom can be found in many places it can be found in different forms and translations. Here is a version of one of the most popular prayers in the Christian tradition. I found this version several years ago translated from Aramaic into English rather than from Aramaic To Greek to Latin and then to English. I kept this translation on a typed piece of paper and had it with me when we left Manoa Valley, nearly three years ago. There have been so many events, thousands of miles traversed, and places lived since packing up from Manoa Valley. Yesterday, as part of my `Ole Days routine, I went through a bag of things rescued from our storage unit in Mount Vernon, Washington. Before moving on to new projects, new decisions and new connections I spent time with the things that came from before. Among those rescued memories was this prayer. I've lost the original source that printed this translation, but believe it might have come from the American Society of Dowser's.

The Lord's Prayer
Translated from Aramaic into English

O cosmic Birther of all radiance and vibration
Soften the ground of our being and carve out a space
Wtihin us where Your Presence can abide.
Fill us with your creativity so that we may be empowered
To bear the fruit of Your mission.
Let each of our actions bear fruit in accordance with our desire.
Endow us with the wisdom to produce
And share what each being needs to grow and flourish.

Untie the tangled threads of destiny that bind us.
As we release others from the entgnglement of past mistakes.
Do not let us be seduced by that which would divert us from our true
Purpose, but illuminate the opportunities of the present moment.

For You are the round and the fruitful vision, the birth-power and
Fulfillment, as all is gathered and made whole once agin.