Many happy returns

The sun is soft in the sky. I come back to the vardo for a bit of writing, dinner is making itself in the crockpot--a rosemary and chicken stew with fresh garden carrots. While our tiny kitchen gets adjusted, the green house serves as cooking place for the time being. The flexibility of small and functional tiny spaces allows for a change of plan, and as we age, we are less fussy about how our plan might appear to an on-looker. Pete eyes the new curve of pipes that extend the Quonset as nothing but steel ribs arch above, JOTS soaks up the low angle of the sun as she naps under the eave of the Au Hale (the wash house).

A couple days ago the four Woods people --Pete, our friends E and M, and I, filled a box with birthday goodies and cards for my son who will celebrate his solar return today. Tokens of comfort and congratulations, a heart-shaped stone, leaves from a sacred planet, and harvests from our gardens ought to greet him tonight when he comes home from working in the winery. Many happy returns, as the sun revisits his position in the sky when he was born 40 years ago. Easily I remember the birth and the amazing feeling of becoming a mother. The work and bliss of labor. What I could not have imagined those 40 solar returns past was the journey that mothering takes as both mother and child grow.

Every year for many years now I tell my son how proud I am to be his mom, and that remains true.Whenever Pete and I have lived my son has come to be with us. Now, he navigates the ropes for creating a partnership with a woman in France. There are details, and the language of immigration law, as well as English and French to paddle through and as in the transport and paddling of a voyaging canoe it takes more than one to make the crossing.

E lauhoe mai na wa'a; i ke ka, i ka hoe; i ka hoe, i ke ka; pae aku i ka 'aina.
Translation: Paddle together, bail, paddle; paddle, bail; paddle towards the land.

Explanation: If everybody works together the work will be done quickly. On interisland trips, the two most important tools besides the sail were the paddles and the bailer. In heavy seas, the water would wash over the boat and so one or more natives would be constant bailing. Others would be paddling together on command to reach their destination in the shortest time.

Source

One email at a time I am learning a bit more about this beautiful woman in France. We get to know each other through the language of virtual mail; I have learned French one word, one phrase at a time:

Bisous is a very cool way to send honi (hugs) Click on bisous to hear it pronounced.

Tournesol is the word for this Sunflower picture sent to France for a bit of cheer. 

Astres means 'stars' and it is something that connects us; we share an interest in the stars, planets, the astrology of papa huli lani (the turning heavens)

This woman of France comes here to Makua O'o for English lessons she says. I told her I was thrilled and honored to know that. That are so many connections possible, trillions of them are made during the journey of PapaHonua (Earth) around the great orb, Ka La (the sun). Zigzagging across the Pacific, or flying through the cyber world to learn of les astres; looking out into a sky as soft as blue flannel blankets. It's a wonderful world, a really wonderful world, and a grand place to practice speaking 'Mother Tongue.'

Turn the radio on (click on the arrow) Happy Birthday, son. 

Scaling mountains: so many ways to climb

More fog this morning. The heads of the Tall Ones are cloaked in gauze. Cool air and a belly full of oatmeal, I take to the keyboard and open to my on-line astrology class with Elsa P. Focused on the transit of Saturn through the sign of Scorpio, Elsa Panizzon dishes out stories, chart analysis and advice with wit, compassion and honed insight. Slowly and steadily, like a Goat (Capricorn-Saturn) one astrological chart at a time, I read and digest the lessons for scaling mountains.

I'm not always sure where a post will lead when I begin though sometimes words do simply back themselves up at my fingertips with directions intact forming sentences and paragraphs. This one is more like the condition of the morning. Instinct has pressed the connection between the Capricorn nature that is very dense in me. After reading and beginning the digestion of today's Elsa class two images set themselves in my mind's eye: one the mountain goat (so often used as a symbol or the animal referencing Capricorn), the other a bull-dozer which is what my father a Capricorn-sun rode for decades of his work life. The article and photo above comes from 1939. Never before have I connected my father's choice of work with his Capricorn nature to scale and skin mountains; but it happened this morning.

"Like a father figure, Capricorn is a role model of self-responsibility and accountability. Saturn, with its penchant for discipline, thrives in Capricorn and therefor rules it. Capricorn must continually redefine inner and outer authroity, sidestepping know-it-all attitudes and embodying instead the teacher who can be taught." - Elizabeth Rose Campbell

Earlier this week I wrote about reconnecting with my mentor, my kumu-teacher Aunty Betty Kawohiokalani Jenkins. Capricorn figure who is both leader and skillful spider who maintains that nature of teacher who can be taught. I reflect on my father, see him in his youth, and during the years when he rode that iron horse with the skill of a mountain goat. He was an expert at it, loving the work even as he was abused by its torque and noise in times before ear-protection was mandatory. Something Elsa wrote about in our class today moves me forward with this piece. It has to do with the reality that Capricorn is just simply meant to "climb" -- work, and teach. Like it or not, if there is Capricorn, there is work. What is that goat looking at?

I picked this photo because that's where I am today. A goat who has done her share of climbing yet I know there are more steps necessary to take. Saturn has taken me to my knees and made it clear when the know-it-all attitude is an inflated attitude masking the work that must be done: my work! Life as makua o'o is a life lived every day: do the dishes, wash the clothes, make dinner, empty the composting toilet, water the garden, love the ones I'm with. Woven into all of it is writing; and I do that from the grist of everything. In ways I can feel now, the routines and rituals of a scaled-down life is the work I have planned to enjoy all along. When there was more -- money, things, stimulation, the ability to see my gifts and opportunities was like dense fog creating an illusion of invisibility. They have always been there (the gifts). Looking back while poised on all fours, the Capricorn in me sees what my father, that original model of authority did to be responsible. It was a harsh form for scaling mountains. But perhaps no harsher than a thousand over journeys.

Capricorn is actually the Sea-Goat, whose mythological origins stretch back further than the classical period. , as represented more or less today in the astrologer’s glyph for your sign. Ea was both prescient and omniscient and was particularly connected with work, wisdom and the instruction of mankind. These characteristics remain to remind us presently, of what is traditionally governed by the sign of Capricorn. - Paul Wade, astrologer

In the Hawaiian language EA means "sovereignty, rule, independence; life, breath, vapor, gas, breeze, spirit; to rise up, become erect.

And a final bit for the cat skinner, whose work is no where near the version of living that is mine today. I found this poem and end with a snipped version of  "The Cat Skinners' Prayer" written by Robert Swanson. This opening stanza was the one that brings images of my Dad on the back of that old D-8 of an iron horse. Please link to the whole poem above

I've shivered and shook on a Dozer
I've ranted, and raved, and I've cu'sed.
My kidneys are dislocated
And I've swallowed ten bushels of dust;
My fingers are broken and bleeding
From wielding the tools of repair.
O God of Internal Combustion,
Please answer a cat-skinner's prayer!

Article and photo credit-link

Ke ala a ke ku'uku'u: "path of the spider"

"A tradition of the sun's north-south track of the cosmic spider, Ke ala a ke ku'uku'u 'path of the spider," is an ancient Hawaiian analog for the sun's motion between solstices and equinoxes in the tropics. The cosmic spider, great Lanalana or Ku'uku'u, spins a web as a grid across the sky in which stars course east to west in fixed tracks, spaces along the horizon being azimuths (lua) 'pit' positions of rising/setting stars, moon, sun, and planets."
"The Hawaiian Understanding of the Universe," Rubellite Kawena Johnson, 2008

The heavens have changed their gowns several times today. Early in the morning while the stars dazzled in a still-dark sky the air was clear and the presence of the wildfires burning in Chelan, a city about 170 miles from Whidbey Island is less persistent. My eyes don't blink to moisten them against the fine soot. Oh how thirsty is Papahonua(Earth). Now, late in the afternoon, kolonahe, a makani olu'olu (a pleasant wind) has moved patches of white clouds into place and the muted blue matches the first days of Autumn. The Equinox has come. From our vantage point here on the island in the middle of the Salish Sea, I sought the shape of Mahina last night and saw her in her finely drawn half-half illumination. In the counting of nights, we are in the 'Ole moons. Today is 'Ole Pau, the fourth and final time of the month when weeding and fixing nets or raking up the yard are perfect activities.

In between the many heavenly changes I made a call to a very special lady. It has been many years since last we spoke, and it seems like a life time ago when first I met her. But when on the third ring I heard her familiar voice as she answered, "Aunty Betty" time closed its arms around us and we were on the same page at the same time. Aunty Betty Kawohiokalani Jenkins is kumu, teacher and mentor. It is she who introduced me to the practice of Makua O'o a practice described and shared with her by her Mama.

Now 84, "Aunty" is as involved as I remember her to be. Her raspy and inimitable voice was alive and interested in sharing her life and her newest  projects. It was interesting for me to hear how she continues to travel and takes her style and her kuleana to Hawaiian communities and communities of First People beyond the shores of the Hawaii. Supported and loved by her family and friends, this woman has been a web-maker and grand spider for many people. I spoke with my neighbor and friend about Aunty Betty, and said the thing that inspires me still is her willingness to continue to be teachable. While she is sought as a speaker and leader for decades now, it is her inclusiveness that models the tool, the o'o (the digging stick) of asking for your input that slays me every time. As skillful as a spider, she creates a grid. Link after link, the grid, the conversation grew into a net of such substance. We caught up on the general and specifics of woman-time: I knew Uncle Jack had passed last year, she knows I cannot go home to Hawaii but also knows I am home where I am. I called Aunty Betty because I needed to tell her how Makua O'o is my foundation, a solid and flexible root. With the value of humility and power elegantly in place I heard Aunty thank me over and again for making this call. She needed to hear something today, and by golly, our conversation was just the thing.

The practice of Makua O'o is purposely one that lays out a set of flexible yet sustaining tools for evolution. Inseparable from all of creation, the maturing adult is in process and progressing just as the heavens and the grid of Ku'uku'u form pathways for huli (turning and movement). The practice is ongoing and there is no graduation. The road to becoming kupuna is the way. You get there when you get there, again and again and in the meantime every day if the sun rises and you are awake E ALA E. Aunty once told me that there weren't many others interested in the ideas and practice of the Makua O'o. When I said, "I am." She said, "Well, you must be the one then." Pela, perhaps. Or paha, maybe it was Aunty's way of making me feel I had made a good choice to step onto that path.

Spider webs appear to be fragile and indeed they are easily swept from ceilings, pulled free unconsciously as one moves through an open gate. But as any child will tell you, they'll be back. And, that's the truth.

These are the original tools (words adapted a bit over time) for the Makua O'o

• Notice
• Listen respectfully
• Believe your best is enough
• Soften the ground of your being
• Ask
• Timing is divine
• Care
• Sense your place
• We are never alone and always loved

As we were about to end our conversation Aunty asked, "Was I talking about the 4-B's when we were last together?" I said no. She said she is always talking about them now and kidded about being an elementary school teacher so keeping things simple was key. Aunty left me with this.

Aunty Betty's 4-B's

1. Believe
2. Behave
3. Become
4. Belong

Aunty Betty, I love you. Mahalo for your webs. We continue to spin them and that is good.
Mokihana

Harvest or waiting

"What crazy roads behind the scene," says the voice that wonders how on Earth I navigate the workings of words and scenery on a cybernetic page. Sometimes, and more often than I care to admit, I have very little idea how things work here in Blog Land. Or pela, the reality is that my equipment (this laptop, the digital camera and my facility with programs) is much like the tools my dear husband uses to craft homes and build our nests. We work with ancient software and carry our tools in a cardboard box. Making do with what we have, life is just what it is and there is a comfort in knowing we pay for what we have and no more. I have been at my tiny desk attempting to download photographs into files, and when they make their way from camera to laptop I am lost as to how to reclaim them. Save for the beauty above! Somehow I did find it and put it here. Maybe, the 'Ole Moons and the energy of Mahina are trying to remind me to wait and later, this facility will come. Beautiful faces of flowers planted around us and in the orchard-- the harvest of transplants from a friend; spring Sunflower seeds warmed in the green house and Nasturiums that return for a second season. I do wonder what it will take for me to move through and up to an evolved facility with the trappings of the computer. Slowly we have built a life on a foundation that is truly, more animal than primate: we manage without high technology, yet know it will be nice when an icepack beneath the laptop is no longer necessary.

For now, the flowers are plenty to remind me of the gift of a present harvest.

Animal Nature

Dense fog has settled upon the moku. "Ah, Spider is splendid in her work, capturing for a time the sweet dew and brings it close to our canopy.  Thank you Spider" Our night of sleep has been filled with the images of unlikely company and situations. They trail like wisps of fog. I cannot capture them as well as Spider, but there is a faint remembering. Sleeping unplugged--without electrical currents running through the vardo, we are refreshed and available to other streams of awareness and pela (perhaps) it is the chaos of non-human awareness that makes dreams such a different world. Outside I hear the squeak of the wringer from the Au Hale (the wash house) Pete is washing and wringing out clothes. Hopeful that the fog will burn off by noon I note the squeak has stopped, his foot-fall replaces the sounds as I finish the sentence and swallow the last of a freshly sliced, fresh picked peach.

The paths around our tiny home spaces are littered with the work of Squirrel harvesting and eating pine cones. Pitch is every where: under foot, under sock, on JOTS tail and paws, and if we are unprepared on pants bottoms pretty much permanently. Yesterday while Pete disassembled our Quonset kitchen preparing us for our winter look, we had time in between tasks to reflect upon the nature of our life here. "I think we are being prepared to become more animal than human," Pete said as we sat together. The statement was simple and unembellished; it felt right and I simply nodded. Kolonahe, the gentle breeze played with the wind chime dangling not far from the bench upon which we sat. The Tall Ones were quiet as the sun moved lower in the sky. They watch us as we are busy with our work, perhaps they watch us just as they watch and feel Squirrel move up and down their skin and talk between them remembering stories of other Squirrels or some Two Legs who lived before us.

My Scorpio nature enjoys the deeply private times that allow me to tell stories that make sense of inexplicable circumstances. I make them up, write them down, and sometimes they tatau my emotions holding on to a memory for too long. Fortunately, I believe this is fortune at any rate, I fuel my animal nature with astres (the stars, planets, the moon and sun and the heavens) and the inexplicable becomes more navigable. Right now, over at my astrologer's blog she writes about a Scorpio.

..."So many people are socialized to think they won’t have to raise a hand in life. It’s fine, until some bastard comes along who wants to kill your for sport.
With Uranus in Aries squaring Pluto, don’t be surprised if this storyline pops up in your life."

"Raising a hand in life." Just what does this mean in my life? Many things have forced me to raise my hand, make a move and take action to save my life. All around me I watch Squirrel and the Tall Ones maintain their lives, above me the Osprey Women dive and catch as their babies imitate. The Heron has come to our man-made pond because the season has dried out other fishing spots; only three planted goldfish remain. While I walked the beach with a new friend earlier this week she noticed things I hadn't: a sound behind us, the murky streak across the sky. The sluff of bank behind us was her signal for moving on. The evidence of forest fires on the other side of the Cascades, no rain for months, a message of interconnectedness.


This weekend Pete and I joined an intimate Story Circle at our local library. Five of us shared stories and began to know one another. I cut and fabricate simple props made from recycled cardboard cartons and paper; and netting we use to protect (with some success) our blueberries from the hungry birds. The props help me learn the story of "How 'Iole Saved Hawaii." As I cut the shapes each prop touched the stream of heart that takes a story deeper than memorization. The often maligned 'Iole -- The Rat, and his role in a time of famine was rendered into written form and offered to me as a gift for telling. Terri Windling writes of the magic and the responsibility of listening for language that is the domain of ALL. Not at all singular as a human activity, Windling has a blog post here that ties things together for me with inspiration from David Abram:

... "Entranced by the denotative power of words to define, to order, to represent the things around us, we've overlooked the songful dimension of language so obvious to our oral [storytelling] ancestors...

The gift and the responsibility of a writer, and a Scorpio like myself, is to hear the song in every thing around me. When I tell of 'Iole, "a skinny rat who has been surviving by eating the dried pitch on the stones ..." I hear and see how the pitch that sticks to every where here in the paths beside my Gypsy wagon is no less the pitch that sustained a rat in Hawaii a very long, long, long time ago.

Go play: An intention for New Moon in Virgo, Saturday, September 15, 2012

New Moon, Hilo in the Hawaiian Moon Calendar, is a time when Hina (the moon) rises while the Sun is visible. To the eye, Hina is invisible but it is that soli-lunar synergy that makes Hilo a powerful time to clear the boards and begin anew. A great time to set an intention. I've been feeling so much ... the sorrow and the pain overwhelming; the responsibilities; so many adult decisions, on and on. Something my husband said as we were just waking up made me think again, think and choose again. Choose different. I've been catching myself when I start spinning old tapes or not-enoughness and wrote about a subtle yet powerful shift and movement here.

Elizabeth Spring's suggestion for tapping into the energy of a 5th House North Node has been keeping me company when the old tapes habitually kick-in. Spring writes:

"Your fifth house North Node here wants to have more fun, and to see life as a game worth playing. It can bring out your entrepreneurial and artistic side as well. This Nodal axis wants to get personal—to risk the love affair, to have a child, to express itself creatively. It doesn’t need to get philosophical and talk about saving humanity---how about just one child at a time? And maybe that child could just be your inner child that’s been neglected for awhile..."

 

I have a partner who is no less a Pan or Puck of European folk tales, more like Robin Hood in ways that make me wonder about our fated connection as Nest Builders. He is off for the morning with his tools, doing things most people like to talk about as good deeds to be done. While he goes off to do things with people, I am here enjoying the oatmeal and raisins he cooked up for us. Pete has a lively Jupiter in the 5th House of creativity and spontaneity, so I am gifted with that example every day. Aware that my journey forward in health includes lightening up and playing more I searched for something to encourage that intention. I found this from Wikihow. The article describes how to embrace your inner child and starts with this:

Remember what it was like to be kid, running around without a care in the world? Well, stop remembering and start embracing your inner child! Here are some ideas for reconnecting with the trusting, fun-loving and perceptive part of you that may just have disappeared under piles of hard work and life's trials.

8 Steps follow for the how-to embrace your inner child, and this one is particularly fun:

#6  Never say the phrase "I'm too old". Try "I'm in my middle youth" instead. Tonight's (in the US) Hilo moon is a great time to stop (just) remembering and start embracing my inner child. Some fun is available if I go do it. That Puckish influence is worthy of rescued action. Go, go. Go play, middle youth!

Awaiting Makali'i ... Makahiki Season begins late October

 Makahiki

The Makahiki festival punctuated the yearly farming cycle in ancient Hawai`i. Celebrating harvest and Lono, the Hawaiian god associated with rain and fecundity, Makahiki marked a temporary halt to activities of war and occasioned lesser changes in many other daily routines. For religious reasons that coincided with seasonal weather, activities such as deep-sea fishing – associated with Ku, the god of war – were kapu, or prohibited, during Makahiki. Beginning in late October or early November when the Pleiades constellation was first observed rising above the horizon at sunset, the Makahiki period continued for four months, through the time of rough seas, high winds, storms and heavy rains...

Source:
http://www.hawaiihistory.org/index.cfm?fuseaction=ig.page&PageID=534

Our top of the island home place is making room for changes. Like the land and critters who have lived here a long, long time we prepare for harvest and look to the season of sharing and rest. My ancestors of Hawaii were keen observers of Nature in all her seasons, but were as well keenly aware of the daily realities of Nature. Noting these realities was an inseparable part of the net that made what they as kanaka (human) did with what happened to Nature they saw, felt, heard and believed. Theirs was not a culture that controlled Nature, but was instead one that knew through generations of observation and living, they had a place and a part of that net.

Here on this moku, my kane and I move things around in our tiny home place to prepare for winter. We will need to insulate ourselves from the coming cold. Yet the irony of an insulating season is that balance necessary to be warm enough without walling off the warmth of relationships and aloha. I draw upon the evolutionary and astrological mana'o (wisdom) of the timing involved in this winter coming this Makahiki Season approaching. Thanks to my enrollment in a wonderfully deep and insightful on-line astrology class I reinforce my knowledge and learn to make peace with the nature of Saturn as that planet of long-term lessons moves through the sky. It makes good sense for me to pay attention; Saturn is my chart ruler and will affect the collective's (all of us) charts as well. Saturn moves from his 2.5 years through the sign of Libra into Scorpio (for the next 2.5 years) on October 6, 2012(oops, corrected that). When Saturn moves from the constellation Libra into the constellation of Scorpio the constellation Pleiades will also be rising on the horizon (in Hawaii) around that same time. Timing. The lessons of Makahiki Season are both practical and metaphoric. Each harvest time there is an accounting of what has been planted and what has been tended; how well we have managed our time-gardens-relationships rise on the horizon.

Pete and I have been in this home space for two years. We have planted ourselves in individual and collective ways: he is very involved with people, I not quite as much. What I do is so much internal and deep rooted work. My imagination and  love of stories that I find there are my community. However, while the planet Saturn has moved through Libra in the past 2.5 years I have attuned to the relationship I have with my attitudes and my friendships. Both of them have needed dusting and adjustments. Part of the healing and recovery from an illness of reactivity is to learn the difference between reacting and choosing to respond. It is a unique healing process and very much a process over time. This Makahiki I am blessed with finding new stories to fuel my needs as a storyteller, and wahine on a healing journey. With adjustments to my attitude (and that does cover a lot of ground) I have found new stories to tell. First, I was invited to gather with a small group of storytellers at a Story Circle in my South Whidbey Island community. It  has been many years since I have told story publicly and in a group. I'm making space for this invitation and refreshing my attitude about storytelling while asking for what I need to feel safe in the process. I said "yes" to this invitation several weeks ago. But only last week did the story that wished to be told show itself.When I discovered Leilehua Yuen's rendering of "How I'ole Saved Hawaii" I knew this was it.

Like I said, it has been many years since I've told stories in public. The old excitement at performing bubbled up. I made preparations: printing copies of the story at the library; and read the story through several times. In the meantime, I searched Leilehua Yuen's (old) website and found no contact information. The protocol for me as storyteller and artist is to ask permission. My prayers and my practice allowed me to continue practicing the story in my heart and mind. Yesterday(four days before the storytelling event) I GOOGLED and found Yuen's current on-line presence. I asked permission to share her beautiful Makahiki story "How I'ole Saved Hawaii."

 Aloha e Leilehua,

I hope this message reaches you and your 'ohana at a good time, and finds you all in good health. I am a storyteller, and author, and makua o'o. My name is Mokihana Calizar. While searching for a story to share at a story telling circle here on Whidbey Island in the Pacific Northwest, I discovered your "Makahiki Stories ... How 'Iole Saved Hawaii." It is a beautifully written version of Na Koko a Makali'i and one which weaves such aloha into each of the moments, and characters.

I am writing to ask your permission to tell a version of your story, crediting you for your rendering, at the South Whidbey Story Circle that takes place this Sunday, August 16, 2012. It is the first of its kind, a small gathering of storytellers to be held at our local library. When I first found your story I wasn't sure how to contact you. But, this morning I GOOGLED, and found your current website, and email.

You are living your story with grace and strength. How wonderful is this. I will wait to hear from you, and refrain from telling this story of I'ole until you have responded to my kahea.

To read some of my writing some of my work is here at my blog www.makuaoo.blogspot.com

Aloha nui loa,
Mokihana Calizar

This is what she wrote back:

E aloha no e Mokihana,

He oli komo keia!

Your event is August 16? AUE!!! I only just now received your e-mail. I am so honored that my telling touched you so that you want to share it. Please feel free to do so whenever you wish.

I would love to see pictures or a video and learn how your next storytelling session goes!

Malama pono,

Leilehua

The season of harvests is always a process and a journey of many plantings, done when the time is right and with attention to the elements of Nature as guideposts. I'm reading and listening the sweet and potent story of I'ole the rat who makes a decision, asks for help, and saves himself and his family (and Hawaii) during the season of Makahiki. The link to Leilehua Yuen's Makahiki story above will take those who are interested to a beautiful story of inter-relatedness and 'enoughness.' I hope I am able to share her story in a heart-felt way as I celebrate and acknowledge the net of Makali'i.

Mahalo e Leilehua:  her current website www.leimanu.com

A signature sky

When I was a girl my aunty had story for a sky like this one. "God is taking his sheep home," she'd tell me. The mango trees and plumeria grew from the ground around us when the clouds pillowed in a sky like this. She had time for me and over time her memory retains its sweetness. The pillowed, sheep sky and sunflowers in our orchard signed itself, Aunty Lily Sky.

What a difference

It might have been too much sugar and caffeine. Or, it might have been me exploring (exploding!) the fit of the Nodal Shift I made the other day. Regular readers know I study astrology with Elsa Panizzon via her blog ElsaElsa; I am not a astrologer. But, if there are new visitors a bit of history ... At a pivotal time I discovered Elsa on the Internet. She saved my life by telling me in essence "if all your friends are deserting you, you might as well float." The advice was so obtuse it made perfect sense. Struggling with the decay and disease I could not explain nor inoculate against, I began writing (this blog and others); helped my husband build a Gypsy wagon to live in and float through the high tide of Global Warming, sensitivities (in all its manifestations), and kept learning astrology via The Astrology Blog. Elsa was the first astrology blog on the Internet, and has proven to be a source of constancy while encouraging a cyber community that respects diversity and 'respect' in general. I'm one of the old gals who is a regular but 'low-key' contributor. I don't write or post much on her blog but participate when I am inspired by the writing or am particularly 'educated' by an interpretation, and am an appreciative student in Elsa's on-line classrooms. My history with Elsa began in 2008.

Earlier this week something Elsa said began to tickle at me like an itch just below the surface. It's not a new thing for Elsa, but it was a new potential for me. From the Boards a year ago I found this that says something about my ramble today.

Elsa wrote: Lots of people out there who have been at it as long as I have use these other systems. I don't know if they have ever tried equal.  people do get attached to their placements and if they move, people don't like it but I can't tell you how many times I have explained their equal house chart to someone and had them realize it described them, instantly.  It's just a no fail thing for me but I would not stop searching on my word. I am just weighing in.

The link to that Board post will give those who are interested, more discourse about the different House Systems(used or preferred when reading an astrological chart). For me, the shift from reading my astrological chart using the Placidus (uneven house) to Equal Houses does two things right away. First, my Scorpio Sun (that does not change when you change the House system) moves from the 10th to the 11th House. Second, my North Node in Taurus (again that does not change) but it does move my North Node from the 4th to the 5th House. The nodes of the moon are polar opposites and with the shift in the way I interpret my chart I am there with what Elsa wrote above: "I can't tell you how many times I have explained their equal house chart to someone and had them realize it described them, instantly.  It's just a no fail thing for me..." The North and South Node influences are a key marker for my life navigation. I've learned and applied a lot of the writing found at Elizabeth Spring's North Node Astrology website. What I'm experiencing with this Node Node-South Node move is: this feels more like me!

Elizabeth Spring writes about an 11th House South Node, "With the South Node in the 11th house, there’s a chance that you need to move up an octave in choosing friends who support you and your dreams, and also a need to leave behind peer pressure in any of its forms. It’s important for you to become clear on who you are and who you want to spend your time with—move away from the crowds or groups that simply fill your time, and find a few “heart-mates” instead of acquaintances, and look for the community or place where you really belong. Look around a bit, so that you can sit at the right “camp-fire.”  it’s time to take more risks, to reach for center stage, and to develop one’s confidence---even if it means allowing your childlike qualities to come out more, and for you to be more of a “character.” Spring's expertise and focus as an astrologer has taught me to examine the South and North Nodes; I've done that. Using my own chart and the patterns and challenges that come up or repeat themselves it makes sense for me to feel the shift in Houses within the signs for a deeper and clear sense of direction. She goes on to say, "Your fifth house North Node here wants to have more fun, and to see life as a game worth playing. It can bring out your entrepreneurial and artistic side as well. This Nodal axis wants to get personal—to risk the love affair, to have a child, to express itself creatively. It doesn’t need to get philosophical and talk about saving humanity---how about just one child at a time? And maybe that child could just be your inner child that’s been neglected for awhile..."

That's the thing with 'sugar and caffeine' and the explosion that took place over the passed couple of days. Too often I've capped off the childlike character to make peace at all costs. It's not a bad thing -- getting along-- but even that can be taken to excess. I'm feeling so close to defining myself so I can and do find people who will be friends with the me I am today. The journey through is messy, there's no way around it when the answers are down there in the muddle. The fun I wish for has hastened me, that little girl me, to remember a friend with curly red hair and freckles. We used to make up dance routines to songs like HARVEST MOON, and explored the wondrous taboos of breasts on friends who had them when we didn't. So long lost this old friendship. I wonder too often if I was ever that playful girl  with a friend who knew I was creative and goofy. But, I was and I still am. I love to make up stuff, love to dance and hope it's not too late to save that girl child. What a difference a move, a day, can make. Twenty-four little hours. Sing it Esther!

Nest building

I thrive on the possibilities of connections, and know that the solitary times prepare me for the planned and unexpected meetings with those who just make me feel good. Inspired by beautiful blog connections like this one over at Terri Windling's the spirit of nest building is made bigger and more right as my husband and I prepare our nests for winter.

a view of our VardoForTwo when we lived on The Ledge 

our first nesting place

I've written a bit of a tale (a brief one) over on our other blog where WE BUILD NESTS. You might like to read and view the world that surrounds us in the woods as we build nests here.

Where do you build your nest?

Celebrating Lili'uokalani ... live her legacy

Sunday, September 2 was Queen Lili'uokalani's birthday. The photo in an earlier post is that of dancers at the annual ONIPA'A (stand together!) celebration at Iolani Palace in Honolulu. As we looked at the 17 photos posted on the Internet this morning Pete leaned over and said, "We'd be there." Yes, we would if we could've and since we couldn't we celebrated instead where we are. In the fruit orchard in the woods on this moku (island) Pete and I joined our friends and land-mates for a Labor Day and Birthday Party for Lydia Liliʻu Loloku Walania Wewehi Kamakaʻeha. Our friends are life-long feminist activists, one a retired anthropologist, the other a nurse-anthropologist who slowly weans herself from a lifetime of teaching. On Sunday as I set about the Vardo cleaning and making the bed I heard The Teacher walking outside and called to her through the open window. She asked, "Guess whose birthday it is today?" I was stymied. She tried to pronounce a name that began with an "L" and I was embarrassed to have forgotten. "Lili'uokalani, I said." "Yeah, Lily!"




Earlier in the year I thought about having an orchard celebration with friends on Lili'uokalani's birthday, but forgot. My friends remembered and so it was that four friends came together to ONIPA'A in the orchard.

The Menu

Fresh caught salmon filleted and oven- grilled with butter and garlic

Dill and cucumber dressing 

Freshly pulled beets steamed among their greens

Sauteed Whidbey zucchini with red onions

Grandmother's recipe for cornbread 

that received rave reviews from a Southerner

Flourless chocolate espresso cake from JW Desserts

Homemade haupia (coconut pudding)

from my mother's copy of The Junior League Cookbook

The Stories

Our lives here, the life we four friends make together comes with history we slowly weave together day after day. We met for the first time three summers ago at the Farmers' Market not far from the orchard. A pair of Irish Blue eyes the color of liquid turquoise greeted us from under a canvas tent where jars of fresh flowers displayed themselves for sale. We, Pete and I, were hunting for a place to park with dreams of rooting our Gypsy souls. Those eyes were those of The Teacher and the rest of the story is our shared history together.

As we said a simple prayer "Thank you!" and joined hands to eat the succulent meal we had other stories to share with one another. Foremost among them was the arrival of a Blue Heron, a male or female we aren't certain. But, what was certain is that the long-limbed darning needle sharped feathered one was making itself very comfortable hunting the fish in our friends' front pond. It creates a bit of a snuffle for though the beautiful winged one is beautiful, two black canines were here first and that front front where exists the pond is 'home territory' to the Boys. I've not discovered the currency of that story for today, but will save it and leave it for now.

Talk of adventures and politics; laughter over made-up words and silliness made eating and digesting the mostly locally gathered and harvested meal a marvelous time. I spoke the Queen's name, and pronounce her names to fill the space with the mana of her deeds and her dear self. We would indeed have been part of the celebration where Lili'uokalani was born, and where I too was born. But, sometimes the journey and the story expands beyond the limits of a moku as it reaches the shore. Beyond the edges of time and boundaries, the essence of a brave woman's example bridges people who might not have met until one life ended and another was born somewhere else.

Lili'u and friends

The haupia was soft and more pudding-like than the firm hold in your hand version of coconut pudding most might eat at a lu'au. Spooned onto or next to the dense flourless chocolate cake, the two flavors just swooned into each other. Rich. Decadent. Endorphin-inducing. We eat. We laughed. We celebrated. In the company of thousands of trees, I bet Lili'u would have enjoyed herself.

E Lili'u e
Noho nani mai.

Hauoli la Hanau Liliu' E ... ONIPA'A, September 2, 2012

Making the most of Libra; preparing for Saturn's transit in Scorpio

Saturn the planet linked with "getting down" and learning the lessons of ones' lifetime moves through the astrological signs (Aries through Capricorn) every 2.5 - 3 years. As patterns in nature and in our lives do repeat themselves (for better or worse) it's been my practice to notice whether my habits serve or disable my elder-in-training journey. For the past 2.5 years "Father Time" Saturn has been in the sign of his glory Libra, presenting experiences related to commitments and relationships; getting along with others is the theme until Saturn moves in Scorpio in early October. My astrologer Elsa P. is teaching an on-line workshop to prepare and assist with the 2.5 years of Saturn's transit through Scorpio.  If in the reading of this post, a spark of interest catches you, please check it out, the class is in its early stages, and lasts through October! She described the intent of that workshop and wrote on her blog:
 

• Learn (Saturn) to manipulate energy (Scorpio).
• Work (Saturn) with your subconscious (Scorpio).
• Manage (Saturn) your power (Scorpio)
• Take responsibility (Saturn) for your shadow (Scorpio)
• Master your fear (Saturn) of the deep (Scorpio)

For Scorpios like me with many planets in the Mars and Pluto ruled water-sign, the workshop is such a boon. Learning in an on-line setting is perfect for me at this time of my life when group settings are difficult for me to manage in person. Over time, and since discovering ElsaElsa The Astrology Blog I learn to interact in the virtual world of the Internet. In many ways I remain the quiet girl who is comfortable alone, and likes to learn in private. But, the years of Saturn in Libra have given me time to think and define the kind of elder-in-training I am now. I do enjoy company, it's now a matter of whose company and though I live mostly a seduced life, when I do interact person-to-person the question is: Who am I when I relate to people? Since Scorpio moves through Libra in my 9th House of world view and philosophy I have made adjustments to the way I perceive my role in the world. Do I want and need to be the same 'teacher-type' I have been in the past, or is my job in need of a tweak? Something else in my learning has left me thinking about accepting the responsibility and the depth of Scorpio -- accept that I am fearful every day of my life, and ENJOY myself, anyway. Now that's mastering fear of the depths.

The Saturn through Libra transit began just after Pete and I began to root ourselves in the woods of Langley. We needed to stabilize and feel connected to something good. I wrote about an astrological angle on this stabilizing process a few months ago and used the North Node of the Moon (Taurus in my case) to braid together a meaningful and meaty story about rooting. Elizabeth Spring's description of the North Node in Taurus:

Soul Purpose: serenity and stability, regaining a sense of the sacred in the ordinary, a sense of having earned and gained by one’s own efforts, honoring good traditions and preserving what is valuable for future generations.

is especially helpful to me at this point. I am involved in the two month long on-line workshop focused on Saturn's transit which will light up the issues of deep power and responsibility in my 10th House. The House which asks 'What's my job?' As an elder, what values and responsibilities have come not through others' efforts or gifts to me but those which I have earned and gained one through my real choices? In other words, what have I learned that is worth preserving and passing along for future generations?

One key phrase has surfaced as I ask myself these questions: less is more. While time has passed since my last post here I have been preparing an application for the first of its kind Safe Oasis Grant. Instigated by the collective efforts of environmentally safe housing activist re/shelter a 501 C Non-profit organization "Re|shelter is currently offering five (5) small grants up to $2,000 each* to individuals whose ability to continue to live safely in their current home has been severely compromised by environmental intolerances.** Since 2007 my husband and I have learned what less is more means. Ever since our nights were spent at the Tide Pools sleeping in our car with the light of Mahina the moon, we began our lessons of 'less is more.'

Slowly yet steadily my life as an elder is blossoming because I live with less and appreciate the grandness of the small things. Like the squirrels who scamper to the ground after they have thrown pine cones onto our roof preparing for winter, Pete and I prepare for our third winter where temperatures and dampness require heat and insulation. The animals teach us that small is enough, but to live well as an aging human, knowing how to resourcefully ask and get the help you need is a talent that falls in the realm of Saturn and Scorpio. Hence the good reason for tuning and tapping into the astrological wisdom of a trusted astrologer. I need to learn to manage the shadow nature of the Scorpio energy in the elder years.Those squirrels are really something: full of mischief and intent on getting what they want (food/pine cones) they fling pines down KNOWING Jots (our kitty) loves squirrel meat. They don't postpone their pleasure.Getting along with others includes making peace with myself. Those squirrels are teaching this old gal some tricks I need to know. 




Whose teaching you some new tricks? 

UPDATE:  A new trick when I look at my natal astrology chart using the Equal House

system: my Nodes of the Moon shift and make "being at home/at peace" with myself, on Earth feel much more real! http://northnodeastrology.blogspot.com/2008/08/south-node-eleventh-house-north-node.html