Saturday, December 22, 2012

December 30th: need a reason for a resolution?

The Sun conjuncts Pluto somewhere in the zodiac, once a year.  This year, the conjunction falls on December 30th.  The Sun Pluto conjunction only occurs at the first of the year, for about 3 years out of 240, so  if you were ever going to make a New Year’s resolution, this would be the year to do so... In whatever case, this is not a fluffy thing nor a fluffy time. You want to set a goal that will require a focused effort. Read the rest from Elsa P.
From Terri Windling's blog Myth and Moor this quote:  "You're an artist ... that means you see the world in ways that other people don't. It's your gift, to see the beauty and the horror in ordinary things. It doesn't make you crazy--just different. There's nothing wrong with being different."  - Cassandra Clare (City of Bones)

Pete and I were up early. Pete finished off yesterday's dishes and I got oatmeal and raisins going on the small stove top burner. The oatmeal was cooked perfectly. I sprinkled each bowl with cinnamon and a dollop of coconut oil and a dose of sesame milk. We ate breakfast over lively conversation about art and resistance.

The topic led to Pete asking, "If there was something physical to [serve] as resistance to get around, over, through what would it be?"
At first I wasn't sure what he was asking. I had to think about it. I think best in silence. Pete likes to talk things through, have conversation. He's got Gemini. We got somewhere between spoonfuls of warm and comforting oatmeal.
"Cold. Cold and damp are physical resistance for me," I said finally.
"I've been dealing with cold all my life," my husband said.
"And, I haven't. Although damp and wet I know. It rains in Hawaii, too. Memories of damp winters and leaky roof." I chimed.
"Thing is with cold, you have to do something to make it better. Just can't sit there. One stone at a time, you have to warm the stone and bring it in. Ask me to warm up another ..." We use stones heated in water and wrapped in wool socks to get intense heat to ward off cold. I got the message he was offering.

If there is a resolution I want to make it is about caring deeply about staying the [long-term] course of art and writing. I know I need to commit to being confident in the work, and open to being taught what I can not do. If I resist? I stay cold. If I stay cold? Well ... Here's what showed up in my writers' group yesterday as I considered the answer to that question.
The Mistress

"Another?" She asked.
"Well really, I'd rather not," I was using my most forthright voice even as my body was feeling more like the insides of the jelly doughnut. The light from the near-shortest day was already deepening the colors outside. Still, there was sun and a blue sky. She was asking whether another dose of practical medicine wasn't what I required. I was trying to assure ... who? I was trying to assure myself that I did not need yet another cold, a second one this season. I continued ...
 "More sleep is all I need, really," my internal edges sense change more thoroughly than many and after all I thought I'd just finished with 10 doses of remedy. The Mistress was patient, infinitely patient, but was not easily swayed when she spotted something out of place. Virgo. She had shared that bit of her birthmarks with me, and I rarely forget.
"Sleep is a good remedy any day of the week, Pale. I know the cold and damp are not your favorite combination. Let it be so, we will make no never-mind." Her voice was calm and reassuring. She cinched her pouch of herbs; the smell of ginger pungent in the air. The Mistress' bent yet still strong fingers rubbed the dry yellow powder between her thumb and fingers leaving the pinkie and ring finger free. "Back into bed then," she said pulling the bed covers back for me she left finger prints of ginger powder at the edges. "For clarity, and dreams that make room for tomorrow." Smiling I simply nodded knowing she had left me with a remedy nonetheless. I nestled against my pillow, pulled the covers against my chin, and slept.
Do you have reason for new year resolutions?

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